What do you do when you have a million assignments due?
There are some people who think they have procrastination down to an art form. I like to think that I'm one of those people. Such an attitude absolves me of any guilt since it means that my acts of procrastination are merely acts of artistic expression, and who in this day and age would ever deny artistic expression?
If only the world was sympathetic to my cause..
Imagine if you had four assignments to do in the next four days..what is the one thing that you would do? For most of you that thing is probably completing your various assignments. Well, maybe you would clean up your room first, and then do your assignment but the end would be the same. This is the way of the amateur procrastinator.
A professional procrastinator would get up at 4AM in the morning and 'warm up' to his/her assignments by checking his/her emails first. If the professional was unlucky enough to have an empty inbox (and thus no distractions) the professional would then surf his/her favourite blogs before checking out the latest news on all the major news websites. Just to be sure that he/she was receiving accurate information he/she would also surf foreign news websites & spend about an hour translating 'Le Monde' via the 100-character google translator. Now.. after all that current affairs a dose of fun would be needed.
There are a number of solutions to this ill: Nuklear Power and The Onion are particularly good. After a few good laughs it would be time to go to Uni, the professional procrastinator would leave at the time of peak traffic & spend 1/2 hour on the road because of it, arriving just in time to have a conversation with friends. Many heated arguments & other meaningless conversations later everyone would have left & the professional procrastinator would only have his/her work to do?
Luckily a President of the Court of Appeal (Noel Anderson) would be taking a lecture courtesy of Harkness Henry. Now surely no one would pass up the opportunity to listen to the President of the Court of Appeal? Especially if they were a law student (as all good procrastinators are). After 45-mins of listening to a judge reading off a pre-prepared script at a dangerously monotone level, the procrastinator begins to question his/her future career aspirations. This eats up an extra hour or so with the procrastinator concluding that he/she would never stoop to being so boring & that President Anderson wouldn't have been anything like the said procrastinator when he/she was young. The President was probably born with that dark grey suit on.
Nevertheless, the extra tidbits of knowledge that the procrastinator managed to pick up in between daydreaming spells would have been the most valuable thing acheived during the day and in a future procrastination experience he/she might even find him/herself trawling through the Waikato Law Review to read the full transcript.
So, with some new knowledge under the procrastinator's belt what's his/her final step? At 11:23PM the professional procrastinator would get out his/her laptop with all the relevant textbooks and course materials. With nothing else left to do the procrastinator sits down...
And starts up an internet blog.
...
Some people never learn.
If only the world was sympathetic to my cause..
Imagine if you had four assignments to do in the next four days..what is the one thing that you would do? For most of you that thing is probably completing your various assignments. Well, maybe you would clean up your room first, and then do your assignment but the end would be the same. This is the way of the amateur procrastinator.
A professional procrastinator would get up at 4AM in the morning and 'warm up' to his/her assignments by checking his/her emails first. If the professional was unlucky enough to have an empty inbox (and thus no distractions) the professional would then surf his/her favourite blogs before checking out the latest news on all the major news websites. Just to be sure that he/she was receiving accurate information he/she would also surf foreign news websites & spend about an hour translating 'Le Monde' via the 100-character google translator. Now.. after all that current affairs a dose of fun would be needed.
There are a number of solutions to this ill: Nuklear Power and The Onion are particularly good. After a few good laughs it would be time to go to Uni, the professional procrastinator would leave at the time of peak traffic & spend 1/2 hour on the road because of it, arriving just in time to have a conversation with friends. Many heated arguments & other meaningless conversations later everyone would have left & the professional procrastinator would only have his/her work to do?
Luckily a President of the Court of Appeal (Noel Anderson) would be taking a lecture courtesy of Harkness Henry. Now surely no one would pass up the opportunity to listen to the President of the Court of Appeal? Especially if they were a law student (as all good procrastinators are). After 45-mins of listening to a judge reading off a pre-prepared script at a dangerously monotone level, the procrastinator begins to question his/her future career aspirations. This eats up an extra hour or so with the procrastinator concluding that he/she would never stoop to being so boring & that President Anderson wouldn't have been anything like the said procrastinator when he/she was young. The President was probably born with that dark grey suit on.
Nevertheless, the extra tidbits of knowledge that the procrastinator managed to pick up in between daydreaming spells would have been the most valuable thing acheived during the day and in a future procrastination experience he/she might even find him/herself trawling through the Waikato Law Review to read the full transcript.
So, with some new knowledge under the procrastinator's belt what's his/her final step? At 11:23PM the professional procrastinator would get out his/her laptop with all the relevant textbooks and course materials. With nothing else left to do the procrastinator sits down...
And starts up an internet blog.
...
Some people never learn.
posted by Dileepa at 6:23 pm
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home